Rolynda Tienda

When you tell me I don’t love you

my head worries “is this fact?”

all this time I was here thinking

that without you my world is flat.

When you tell me I don’t love you

I can’t put myself but down,

all this time I thought I loved you

but you’ve taken back my crown.

When you tell me I don’t love you

I have to let myself down

let my smile turn to melted etches

of the saddest frown.

When you tell me I don’t love you

I hold myself back

I think about the things I did

to make you think just that.

When you tell me I don’t love you

I hurt deeper still

deeper than the deepest ocean

my love is all my will.

When you tell me I don’t love you

I remind myself before

of the times when it was all so easy

nothing was a chore.

When you told me I don’t love you

I told myself right away

that the truth is that I love you more

than I could ever show or say.

I may seem like a burden

someone’s peeve and so abrupt

I may seem as if I don’t want near you

but I have to break my trust.

I love you more than life itself

no matter what you think,

I love you like the leaves of trees

need waters for a drink.

I love you like an ocean

loves all it’s fishy friends.

I love you more than liberty

loves all it’s slow amends.

I tell you that I love you

but I know you don’t believe

I know it’s hard to see it

when all I do is leave.

I’m sorry about my person

theres nothing in my charm

the way I made you feel that day

does us not but harm.

I want you to know I’m honest

I can’t pretend to lie

part of the way I treated you

was protection from your eyes.

I’ll never think I’m worthy

I’ll know I never was

no matter what you decide

I know that all I did was try

sometimes it was too much.

But please know that I do love you

that I wish I held your hand

everytime that you were next to me

but you’ll never understand.

Somethings just keep me from it

fear that I’ll decay

I don’t get how you’d want me

when I can’t stand my own face.

I apologize for pushing

pushing everything away

I want to love the way you love

but what if I destroy it any way?